1. |
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Yo it’s Weekly Words and Grammar
Puttin bitches in the slammer
Spillin spaghetti all over my feet
Thinkin bout tiddies and eatin some beets
Yo it’s ya boy Uhole, with the old consoles
Grab hold and letcha bowels lose control
Screaming and dreamin my Nintendo dreams
And I’m schemin on how to go back to those things
It’s 2018, our lives are shitty memes
Is there even anyone left in this scene?
The world is cruel but hey I guess that’s p cool
Just laugh, it’s one big joke- too bad we’re so damn woke
We’ve got no hope, but at least there’s avocado toast
Earth is a dumpster but we’ll just make the most
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2. |
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You’ve always been there for me when I needed you
When the world was cruel, or when I wasn’t well
Others have come and gone over the years
But none have stuck around like you, Taco Bell
Cheesy gordita crunch, chicken quesarito
Whatever I desire, you always seem to know
For just five dollars you make the pain go away
You are my sunshine on cloudy days
Don’t even get me started on Doritos tacos
Surely the fine cuisine the gods themselves would have chose
Bring the hot sauce- yo light me up!
Put that good shit in this cup
You call it Baja Blast- refreshing and ice cold
You can’t fool me, I know I’m drinking liquid gold
The final form of Mountain Dew
It gives dead souls hope anew
Yeah dude, it’s true
Cheaper prices, open later
Outside the bun innovator
Yeah dude, it’s true
Tomorrow I might shit my ass for real
But who cares, I gotta get that fourth meal
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3. |
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Smash five! Smash five! God bless you Sakurai
For a moment I was almost glad I’m alive
And guess what bro, my uncle works at Nintendo
I got that new roster, so sit back, let’s go
At long last my boy Reggie finally shows up
Then Goku comes in too and the whole planet blows up
Straight from the swamp, the all-star Shrek is in for real
Almost as high a tier as fellow challenger Hank Hill
I'd better get a hundred characters, plus unlocks
Even though I will only ever play as Fox
But there is one newcomer that beats the other fighters real bad
The strongest guy in the whole world
The champion- yeah it’s my dad
Another dude who joins the fight
Yeah it’s ya boy- it’s Jesus Christ
I'd better get a hundred characters, plus unlocks
Even though I will only ever play as Fox
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4. |
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Shitty indie horror games
Garbage but gold all the same
Bland font logo from MS Paint
Broken English right there in the name
A stolen monster model stuck in the T-pose
Chases me without moving, on Heelys I suppose
Five Nights at Sonic’s/Elsa’s/who-the-fuck-ever’s
And Slendy’s hundreds of slightly different endeavors
Your voice acting makes “Jill Sandwich” seem Oscar-worthy
You breathe louder than you speak- it’s other-worldly
Random notes in your shitty midi soundtrack
2008 called, it wants my music back
So I survived the spooky skellingtons you threw at me
But there is one more threat that I may never beat
Crashes- more here than in a racing game
The twelve-year-old programmer is the one to blame
He is so goddamn proud, and I am ashamed
I can’t stop playing even though they’re all the same
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5. |
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Spaghetti cat
I weep for you
It's all I can do
To keep from falling apart
Cause you're breaking my heart
Oh when I first saw you
On that daytime TV show
I knew it was Destiny
So I called them up, I said
"Who's that cat, I need to meet him
I need to have some spaghetti with him"
And they said "The cat isn't real dude
It's just some picture"
Just some- how fucking dare you?!
Spaghetti cat is real!
Spaghetti cat is my life
And he always will be
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6. |
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Ay yo it’s Knuckles the fuckin’ enchilada
Fuck wit me, ya get punches- a lotta
Cause this enchilada’s got mad fuckin beef
Yo, I’m too slow? Bitch I knock outcha teef
Comin atcha straight from Pumpkin Hill
Where shit gets real, yo I’m the trillest of the trill
Rouge the bat’s got a booty that dumps like a truck
Don’t really know what that means but it sound good as fuck
I’m the only one who can dig it
Ya know, cause I dig, ya get it?
Ah, whatever- here we go!
Who gets the girls- is it me or Sonic?
Here’s a little hint: I got four times the head on this dick
Does he even lift? Look at me, I’m hella swole
While fatass Sonic stuffs more chilidogs into his food hole
Don’t fux with Knux if you know what’s up
Shadow’s for sure the Gucci member of the hedgehog gang
He’s a bad boy- he says no no words like “heck” and “dang”
But ya boy Knuckles always keeps it a hunnit
Fists on fleek, fighting freak, boy I just dunnit
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7. |
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On the campgrounds no one can hear you scream
Well I guess that isn’t true, but fuck off it fits the theme
One dude insists that we were talkin about bears
That didn’t happen, but do you think he cares?
Later he asks “you said you’re gonna wet your body?”
Again, no, you okay there buddy?
Next, a weird dude in the bathroom
Looks out from the shower, scans the room
As we leave after our peepee sessions
This guy calls out to us “any questions?”
And speaking of restroom transgressions...
A guy moans in the next stall, asks why god hates him so
A woman angrily shouts “pinch it off, it’s time to go”
His mug which says “grandma” is filled with something red
It might have made me shit on sight, but I already did
Then it hits us - everyone else here is a skinwalker
They learn only from each other which makes them awkward
Only flimsy tent walls protect us from ending up dead
But we paid for one more night so fuck it I’m going to bed
If they mean to kill me, then I mean to die
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8. |
Deep Sea Squeeze Trees
02:08
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What more could you ask for?
I'm rappin to the booty
The cloaca drops deep as does my banana
I never dropkick, 'cause to dropkick is the papa of anna
The cloaca drops deep as does my banana
You can take the crusty bear trap
You can break my booty
Like I'm made of hamburgers
Like I'm made of hamburgers
Like a crusty bear trap
Oh so crusty!
Like a supple John Cena action figure
They get on with life as a grandma
They're a sad kinda type
They like fappin on Sundays
They like nappin in the week
They like to contemplate hentai
But when they start to daydream
Their minds turns straight to Jesus
Straight out the salty dungeons of rap
It all began on a lonely December midnight
I was the most depressed sandwich artisan around
He was the most dead former person
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9. |
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We’re practically raccoons - black all around our eyes
And trash is what we eat, in trash is where we thrive
None of us are ninja spaceman pirates of the sea
But we were told that we could be anything we wanted to be
We work around the clock, like sixty hours a week
If we dare to do something fun we get like three hours of sleep
We were promised again and again
That the world was about to end
Don’t fuckin tease me bro
Let’s get the show on the road
But before we bring the doom
Let’s safely send all cats to the moon
In the meantime
We’ll just follow hallways
The days are long
But the years melt away
So we’ll live fast, and we’ll eat ass
And we’ll wait for this shit to pass
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10. |
The Song of Our People
03:08
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The new American dream for 2018
Is just to no longer be alive
More than our beloved avocado toast
What we want the most is just to die
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Unicorn Hole Lexington, South Carolina
Nintendocore artist from Lexington, SC. Uhole is Lawrence Nelson.
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